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SATIRE: SARGASSUM WEED TO THE RESCUE

DR-Tulsi-Dyal-Singh

Some people are worried and upset
how seaweed from the Sargasso Sea
are piling up on the seashores of Guyana
and how they are stinky and unsightly
a threat to health, maybe even sovereignty
since it’s an invasion from offshore,
but like incoming barrels and remittances,
oil blocks and Exxon, they are acceptable.

Oil was handed out by Providence
as it was for Sargassum weed.
This thing could be the sought solution
for any oil spill in the making,
by drying it, and baling it like hay
and reserving it as a sponge or towel
for the day, if ever, a long black slick
comes wading in, to tar the coast.

I saw a north coast Jamaican beach
just a couple months ago
where flotillas of seaweed were swimming in
to brown themselves upon the beach,
requiring a full time crew of beach attendants
to rake them into mammoth mounds
for disposal elsewhere in the island.

I asked the supervisor who informed me
that the seaweed would be turned to goats
because goats seem to thrive on it
and it makes great fodder to grow the flock,
boosting production of ram goat liver
and expanding the use of “mannish water”
as he chuckled about details, as if I hadn’t heard.

Incorporate something in a tax free jurisdiction
and call it maybe Saragaxxon Hexx
and mobilize some leveraged dollars
where Guyanese will pay the interest
and create two unfenced lines of business
the first to provide nature’s own organic wipes
for any potential oil spill near Guyana;
the second to make fodder for the goats
for a cornucopia of curried goat,
ram goat liver and mannish water
for food and export to the Diaspora.

Tulsi Dyal Singh, MD.

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